Love is what you are; it’s the center of your creation. It’s your point of origination and can become your point of attraction as well. As Karl Menninger told his patients, and anyone else who was suffering and willing to listen, “Love cures, the ones who receive love and the ones who give it, too.” – Wayne Dyer
From the time we are young, women are taught that society will judge us based on our appearance. We are also taught to criticize others, along with ourselves, when we do not meet arbitrary standards set by arbitrary people. How many times have you been in line at the grocery store, staring at the front cover of the latest gossip magazine, reading a headline that berates some publicly known female for not wearing make up when she left the house that day, or for the woman that has the audacity to have cellulite on her legs AND wear a bikini to the beach?! These “journalists” act like we should all recoil in horror if a famous woman leaves her house to attend a yoga class IN yoga clothes.
Whenever I read beauty magazines, or even when I watch the news, I feel a great deal of underlying of anxiety. Even though I know that what I am looking at isn’t always real, beauty magazines cause me to judge myself in comparison to the women in the book, who stare back at me with flawless makeup and airbrushed cellulite. While I tell myself that their appearance is contrived, it still creates a false feeling that I am somehow not a good person because I do not look the same, nor does my face appear in a magazine.
The news functions in much of the same manner when they sensationalize the smallest of stories for their own gain in viewership. Media’s primary function is to generate fear and doubt within society. The more suffering we see around us, the easier it is to feel trapped in the dream of society that is “hell”. In Part 6, Ruiz declares that this way of communicating with one another is done to intentionally promote suffering which keeps us stuck.
He calls all of this negative type of communication gossip and it poisons our minds much like a virus infects the hard drive of a computer. When someone interjects an opinion that creates judgment, doubt, fear, anxiety or suffering, they are infecting your mind with the virus of gossip. It bogs down the mind’s ability to produce good results or to function at optimal levels. When we are fixated on worry, we lose energy. Our mind becomes fertile ground for anger and resentment, rather than for joy and love.
What about when you gossip about yourself? When you constantly berate yourself for the smallest of mistakes, you create self-defeating beliefs about who you are and what you want. The first priority in practicing the first agreement then, is to FIRST change how you speak to yourself, then you can change how to you speak to others. Being impeccable with your word, Ruiz says, will cultivate the mind into fertile ground for love. If you are to be impeccable with your word, then you are to be free of the hell you place yourself in when you gossip.
Impeccability means you speak in a manner that promotes life and is free from hate. When you are impeccable, you transcend hell to reside in love.