Holding onto anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned. ~ Buddha
I am starting my new year out with this in mind…..I will no longer hold in anger, nor will I avoid it. Anger can be a powerful tool to create necessary change. It is when the anger consumes us and we become attached to it as a part of our identity that it causes prolonged resentment and discord in our lives. Being “pleasant” all of the time doesn’t make you a better or kinder person, it makes you out of touch with your authentic self. In the new year, can you first acknowledge how you feel so that you understand what must be done to change it?
laurariggs.com 
Yes, your counselor is wise! I totally agree – and definitely a necessary part of the grieving process!
My wise counselor says anger is the emotional layer on top of fear and loss. If you can identify what you are afraid of and recognize what you've lost, you can deal with the anger.